I am a slow learner. Not when it comes to hard facts, remembering historical dates or even chemistry formulas. It’s more about emotions, so we can rather say I am not able to adapt easily.

I realised this while returning from home after Chhath Puja this time.

I am not really a flight person unless, obviously, it is very urgent, or it is a very long journey. Trains have a special place in my heart, probably because my father is a retired railway engineer. Our family has enjoyed a lot of free rides, my favourite being the journey from Lucknow to Nasik, all thanks to him.

But, as you grow up, one thing that you are always struggling for is time and flights help you save that time. With three days’ leave in hand, all I could do to make the best out of it was to catch a flight.

While I was heading home, it didn’t feel that weird that I woke up at 4:30 in Indore and by 10:30 the same morning I was embracing my mum at home in Lucknow. Happiness and excitement do make you think less. Like I am pretty sure the pilot announced the outside temperature when I landed in Lucknow as well, but it hit me only when I was returning to Indore and I started wondering why they do that.

I know that most probably it’s just basic courtesy or just a piece of information that passengers find interesting. But, I would like to believe that they do so because you have travelled a very long distance in a very short span of time and inside the aeroplane you have no idea how your surroundings have changed.

When I landed back in Indore and reached my flat it took me some time to comprehend the fact that just this morning I woke up in a house full of people and life. Where I did not have to think about what to have for breakfast, where my mother had already packed my lunch box before I even woke up, where my sister packed my bag for me and where my father dropped me at the airport without even me having to ask for it. Then, all of a sudden, back to nothingness or independence, as we may call it euphemistically.

I am so used to sleeping in one city and waking up in another that crossing that same distance, on the same morning, within two hours, took me off guard.

The longer journeys give you some time to gulp it all. On the train, you see the whole journey unfold in front of you, almost like a very slow transition. From one station to another, our surroundings change gradually; the weather, the people, the language, everything.

I remember almost tearing up at Lucknow railway station every time, but by the time I reach my destination, I have already made up my mind, sorted the course of action and sort of back to what I am supposed to be in this city.

The situation is almost similar to how we find ourselves begging someone to stay a little longer when they break up with us. It is because we don’t know how to act after the connection is suddenly snapped. We ask them not to completely stop talking because we are used to that communication, and so we want time to let our feelings resolve. This request often gets rejected though, as the other person has already moved on and cannot waste their time with us anymore.

So, it’s a battle between time and emotions everywhere and there is no solution to this. Life doesn’t give you time to settle down, sometimes not even physically, let alone emotionally.